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Don’t Be Like Me. Be Like You.

The other day you said those eleven magical words that can absolutely make a mother melt:

“When I grow up, I want to be just like you.”

What more could a mother wish for than for her daughter to look up to her in such a way, that she dreams of one day being just like her?

I believe there is an even better wish. I hope that when you grow up, you are just like YOU.

Each of us was created with a unique combination of characteristics, gifts and passions. The mold is made….and broken. The recipe for “you” isn’t one that can be repeated.

You have strengths that I don’t have and passions that are different than mine. And I’ve never, ever met anyone who is just like you.

So be that.

Be it 100%. Be you with all of your flaws and all of your uniqueness.

Be you when it helps you fit in.

Be you when it makes you stand out.

Be you when the world is telling you to be them.

Be you when you are telling yourself to be me.

I won’t agree with all of your choices, I’m sure of that, but they are YOUR choices.

My job as your mother is to give you guidance and values and then to send you off into the world and trust that I did my best.

Your job is to share your special gifts with passion and conviction.

It makes my heart happy to know that you look up to me and that I can be a guide for you in this, sometimes overwhelming, world. I’ll be your safety and your home. You can trust me 100% with every crazy idea you may come up with. I’ll stand alongside you when life gets messy and confusing.

And I’ll watch you learn what it means to be you. To really, really be you.

There is a catch though. It may take a while to figure out exactly who “you” is, and the journey can be full of mistakes and discomfort.

 

You’ll choose the wrong friends, the wrong career, or the wrong attitude. You’ll try one thing on and decide if it suits you or not. This process doesn’t take years, it takes decades.

But you’ll get there.

You will find out who you really are and it will feel like slipping on a cozy pair of pajamas.

And they will be YOUR pajamas. Not mine.

And you will be spectacular.

Because you will finally have discovered YOU.

Sharon Suchoval:
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